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Dreading the Holidays? It’s Not Just You.

Do you find yourself dreading the holiday season, or just not excited about it? If so, I promise you're not the only one. 🎄❌

One report from the National Alliance on Mental Illness suggests that 64% of people with mental health issues feel worse during the holidays.

Whether you have a diagnosed mental illness or not, you might just be sad, depressed, or anxious during this time. This is ... normal.

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9 Predictions for the Year 2050

Highlights: in the year 2050, we still haven't met the aliens, Zoom is like Myspace, and American football goes away. There's much more in the post.

Last year I read Remembrance of Earth's Past, a science fiction trilogy by Chinese author Liu Cixin. The total length runs to more than 1,300 pages, but I loved it so much I would have kept reading if there was another book in the series.

The story has several themes and takes place across tens of thousands of years. Repeatedly, scientists and political leaders living in one point of history are trying to plan for something that will occur hundreds of years later, long after they'll be dead.

It turns out that trying to predict the future is tough!

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Always Ask for What You Want: A Lesson in Asymmetrical Risk

TLDR: An asymmetrical risk is one where the potential reward greatly outweighs the potential loss. Identify and take more of these risks.

Every so often, a news article that offers "expert advice" on getting upgraded at the airport makes the rounds. Inevitably, the advice includes something about how you should "dress well and ask nicely."

Real travel experts always roll their eyes at such advice. These days, almost all upgrades are handled through computer systems based on elite status, travel disruptions, and other automated factors.

The travel experts then write their own articles explaining why the advice is dumb, and the process repeats a few months later.

I'm with the real travel experts: the advice on asking for upgrades is just clickbait. Yet I can't help but remember a time many years ago—way back in 2007, I think—when I was traveling from Copenhagen to Chicago.

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Develop Your Dominant Questions

One time, Will Smith was working on a film set in Toronto. It was the middle of winter and they were shooting night scenes, so the actors and crew worked 6pm to 6am. Brrr! 🥶

During breaks, Smith could have huddled in his trailer, complaining about the bitter cold. Instead, he ran around making jokes and delivering hot chocolate to crew members. He acted on a question that he later explained is constantly on his mind: How can I make this experience more magical?

Working in the cold sucks, but the job had to be done. Rather than complain about it, and rather than just endure it, Smith set out to make the experience better (or "more magical") for everyone else.

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Risky Decisions That Turned Out Well

Strategy: To increase your risk tolerance, remind yourself of risky decisions that have turned out well.

As with the list of things you've done that few other people have, this is not merely a list of accomplishments. The key point is to identify risks you've taken, bold moves, and other decisions you made that could have gone south but ended up paying off.

Of course, what's "bold" for you may be different from me, and vice versa. But here are a few of mine...

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Would You Live Your Same Life Over Again?

Among other things, the German philosopher Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche was known for an outrageous mustache that frightened away potential soulmates. He also said a lot of outrageous things, which caused him to be shunned by much of society at the time.

One of those things was a simple, provocative question: â€śWhat if I had to live this life over again—would I be able to stand it?”

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How to Talk to Someone Who Believes a Conspiracy Theory

I just came from the pizza parlor that doubles as a global headquarters for child trafficking. I counted up some ballots that proved the election was stolen.

On the way back, I stopped by the drugstore to get my microchip. I tried to tell the pharmacists about how 9/11 was an inside job, but they didn't seem interested.

Okay, let's slow down. I'd like to address a topic that has become increasingly relevant: how to talk to someone who believes in a conspiracy theory.

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What is the bravest choice you can make right now?

If you want to be more courageous, you have to make brave choices. Sounds simple enough—but how do you know which of those choices to make next?

When I first thought about the question for myself—what’s the bravest choice I can make right now?—I didn’t have an obvious answer. And that felt a little discouraging!

It was like being in a room with inspiring people, all talking about the big important projects they’re working on, and when my turn comes I say something like “Oh, I don’t know … I’m pretty much doing the same stuff as always.”

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Do you feel anxious about time? Take this survey!

--> 5-minute survey on Time Anxiety

I received a flurry of responses to my initial post on time anxiety, and it's been interesting to hear lots of stories from readers. To recap:

Time anxiety is the fear of running out of time. You feel like there's something you should be doing, but you're not sure what it is.

I believe that time anxiety is the most pressing problem of the modern world. Once you work your way through Maslow’s hierarchy and your basic needs are taken care of, you start worrying about time—and you never stop.

  • You worry that time is passing you by
  • You worry you’re too late or you missed your chance for something important
  • You worry there’s something you should be doing right now, but you’re not sure what it is

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What’s something you’ve done that few other people have?

It's a simple question: what have you done that few other people have? Think about it.

Naturally you might start to list your accomplishments or achievements. Some of those might make the list, but many would fit in a different category. A lot of things you accomplish are things that other people have done as well. In addition, perhaps you've done something that isn't quite an accomplishment per se, but it's rare to meet someone else who's had the same experience.

Those are the things that should go on this list.

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Change Your Future to Rewrite the Past

“People think that only the future can be changed, but in fact, the future is continually changing the past. The past can and does change. It’s exquisitely sensitive and delicately balanced.” -Keiichiro Hirano, At the End of the Matinee

When we think about time, we tend to divide it into three dimensions: past, present, future. We also tend to accept certain beliefs about each dimension without much questioning.

The present time is the "here and now." It's what's currently happening. The future, alternatively, is what will happen. It's what will come to be.

Unlike the present and the future, the past is locked in ... right? Short of inventing the elusive time machine, there's not much we can do to change the past. We simply have to accept it and move on. Or do we?

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Time Anxiety Is the Most Pressing Problem of Our Age ⌛️

Time is running out, and you should be doing something about it … but you don't know what it is.

That's what this post is about: something called time anxiety. I've been dealing with it for years, and maybe you have, too—even if you've never heard the name.

I believe that time anxiety is the most pressing problem of the modern world. Once you work your way through Maslow's hierarchy and your basic needs are taken care of, you start worrying about time—and you never stop.

  • You worry that time is passing you by
  • You worry you're too late for something—you missed your chance
  • You worry there's something you should be doing right now, but you're not sure what it is

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Lessons from an Errant Rocket Ship

From time to time, it's good to be reminded of your insignificance. Last week provided an opportunity in the form of a Chinese rocket that was falling to the earth.

Perhaps you heard about it. Thankfully, all was well in the end, but until it landed, no one knew where the rocket would touch down. It could have been anywhere on earth! Just think about it: for all the advances of science and technology, we had no idea where on the entire planet a rocket would decide to return.

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The Present-Day Time Machine

Most of us can think of times in our lives that we'd like to relive.

When these moments occur in the first place—the original events that become memories—we don't always realize realize how significant they'll become in our internal story.

That's only natural, because sometimes ordinary moments can take on much more meaning after the fact.

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Regret Is an Unreliable Emotion

I have long believed that thinking about regret is a powerful motivator for action. When you're feeling indecisive, trying to figure out if a particular step is a good one, consider how you'll feel if you don't take the step. Often this leads you to what seems like the right direction.

But while mental models can be helpful, most of them also have limits. Lately I've realized there's a flaw in the logic of focusing your attention on the avoidance of regrets. Simply put, regret is an unreliable emotion.

Think about that for a moment—what does it mean?

It means, in short, that regret is both difficult to anticipate and even harder to characterize in retrospect. If you feel certain about your choices in either direction—either looking back or looking forward—you may be basing your interpretations on selectively chosen information.

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