happiness : The Art of Non-Conformity

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The Impact of Age on Happiness, Especially In Times of Crisis

New research reveals that situational happiness or sadness may relate partly to age.

"Long ago, when I was 30 and he was 66, the late Donald Richie, the greatest writer I have known, told me: 'Midlife crisis begins sometime in your 40s, when you look at your life and think, Is this all? And it ends about 10 years later, when you look at your life again and think, Actually, this is pretty good.'
In my 50s, thinking back, his words strike me as exactly right. To no one’s surprise as much as my own, I have begun to feel again the sense of adventure that I recall from my 20s and 30s. I wake up thinking about the day ahead rather than the five decades past. Gratitude has returned."

Life

Happiness Is a Superpower

I heard something in a dialogue recently. One character was complaining about being unhappy, and the other character replied, “You have a misguided notion of what makes you happy.”

The sentence made me stop and think. Most of us, at different times, have a misguided notion of what we think will make us happy. We go around trying out different prescriptions and remedies.

Maybe the new thing will work ... or maybe I should go back to the old one?
Maybe there's still something else out there, just waiting to be discovered?

That’s why the alternative to misguided notions—true clarity with the possibility of contentment—is so powerful. Knowing what will really make you happy, as opposed to what you think will make you happy, is no less a superpower than flying.

Profiles

“Happiness Depends on You”: On the Road with Scott Bold and Michelle Eshleman

This is a traveler case study. (Read others or nominate yourself.)

Dreams can change, as was the case of Scott Bold's childhood dream. The younger Scott wanted a good job and decent salary, but his adult self wanted something else. So along with his girlfriend Michelle Eshleman, they set out on a different course.

"After I achieved everything I had dreamed of as a child - a nice car, high-paying job, good friends, fancy meals, and gadgets - I still wasn’t happy. I looked at everyone higher up than me at my job and didn’t see my happiness reflected there (not to mention they didn’t seem happy, either).
So I questioned what made me happy, and realized what I wanted was freedom, new experiences, and exploration."

Life

To Be Happier, Go to the Library

If you liked the Japanese tradition, here's another one from this side of the Pacific:

“Older people often draw as much happiness from ordinary experiences — like a day in the library — as they do from extraordinary ones.

Personally I'm still a fan of jetsetting about on international trips, so I don't think you have to choose between travel and "ordinary experiences"—but yes, a day at the library can bring a lot of joy.

Link: Affixing More Value to the Ordinary Experiences of Life

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Life

Units of Momentary Happiness

“Everything we need to be happy is easy to obtain.” -Epicurus I’ve long advocated that happiness is not entirely related to a feeling of a precise moment. Instead, it’s more closely related to the overall life we live, as well as the life we hope to have in the future. If you quit smoking, you…

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What to Prize Above All Else in the World: Lessons from a Soviet Forced Labor Camp

“What about the main thing in life, all its riddles? If you want, I’ll spell it out for you right now. Do not pursue what is illusionary — property and position: all that is gained at the expense of your nerves decade after decade, and is confiscated in one fell night. Live with a steady…

Life

Lessons from the Journey: Unhappiness Can Lead to New Beginnings

“To the discontented man no chair is easy.” -Benjamin Franklin From my own 193-country journey to the stories of many other people who were kindly willing to share, The Happiness of Pursuit attempts to extract and convey the lessons of modern-day quests. This series explores some of these lessons. Lesson: Unhappiness can lead to new…

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The Difference Between Happiness and Meaning

“The things that make you happy are not the same things that make your life seem meaningful.” That’s how Ben puts it, and I agree. I’ve also written about this several times before: in The Tower, for example, or in my first book. To increase happiness, do something fun. To increase meaning, do something challenging.…

Work

How Much Money Is Enough?: A Conversation with Gretchen Rubin

Research shows that money can buy happiness sometimes—but the amount of money isn’t one-size-fits-all. J.D. Roth talked to Gretchen Rubin about how to find the number that works for you. *** J.D.: Once people have a certain amount of money or a certain amount of material comfort, that additional money only brings on a marginal…

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Life

When You’re Happy, You Don’t Have to Tell Anyone

“If you really want to be happy, no one can stop you.” -Anonymous As I was editing a new book manuscript, one story caught my attention. A man makes a lot of changes in his life. He adopts a new lifestyle, sells his possessions, and spends his time on intentional experiences. So far, so good.…

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Life

Three Types of Happiness: How Do You Choose?

In The Happiness Myth, Jennifer Michael Hecht defines three types of happiness: a moment of happiness, a good day, and a happy life. Hecht suggests that no further definition is needed because the difference between the three is obvious when we use or hear the word happiness in context. However, she points out that these…

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Life

How To Be Unhappy

The pursuit of happiness is as old as modern civilization. Books, elixers, religions, and philosophies are all devoted to it. Happiness is a quest, an obsession, and a universal aspiration. But what does it take to be unhappy? In some ways, it's easier than happiness itself. New research and much life experience offers a simple recipe for genuine discontent.

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Work

The One-Page Career Cheat Sheet

Are you happy in your job? This fun resource—a one-page, "career cheat sheet"—from Sarah K. Peck can help you think through the question in a structured way. Sarah published this chart last month and has received a strong reaction. Here's what she had to say about it ...

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Would You Buy Happiness for $14.03?

Happiness is either free or priceless – I guess it depends on your perspective. But if you'd like to learn about a great writer's year-long quest to discover what really makes her happy, your cost is a mere $14.03. Or you can win a copy paid for by me. In case you haven't heard, Gretchen Rubin's new book, The Happiness Project, is out today. It's currently #40 on Amazon.com and killing it ... well, as much as a book on happiness can kill something.